It seemed like all of the Universe was telling & showing us (me mainly) that now really was finally the right time to get married:
- My dad was tired of calling Jeff simply my “friend” to his friends (instead of something like significant other, spousal equivalent, partner, or soul mate).
- It’s Leap Year.
- The Moon, Jupiter, & Venus all lined up.
- My brother’s sudden death totally slammed home to us how precious each day is with loved ones. [Our new daily mantra is TODAY IS A GIFT.]
- We neither one need anymore to feel that we can just bail out easily & quickly if our relationship gets difficult. We actually LIKE each other & are best friends.
- After Jeff’s dad & my brother’s deaths, we DO need a sense of permanence.
I spent most of Tuesday evening looking at wedding bands on line. We had no idea what was currently available that we’d both like to wear. Amazingly, I found a pair of black tungsten carbide rings with never-ending Celtic love knots laser etched into them. Diamonds are the only thing stronger than tungsten & it’s hypoallergenic. Jeff’s never worn jewelry because both it & his skin turns green.
Unfortunately, it would be several days before receiving our selected wedding bands so we spent much of Wednesday going to jewelry stores, pawn shops, thrift stores, discount stores, even a hardware store looking for inexpensive substitute rings to use in our wedding ceremony.
Nothing grabbed us, & I didn’t really want to feel emotionally connected to something I wasn’t wanting to wear again after our permanent rings were received. So — we improvised. We created our own perfectly fitting rings from black wire ties! Extremely strong, most difficult to break, but very flexible. Sounds like a good description of a great relationship. We’ll hang them on a white wire tie over the rearview mirror in the pickup when our new rings arrive.
I asked a childhood friend who became a lawyer & currently is a Circuit Court Judge to perform our wedding ceremony. His name is also Dennis — like my brother — & was a good symbol of my missing sibling. I never really knew (nor do I remember who) any of the previous people who married me.
So we met Dennis at a small city park on a beautifully clear, sunny, but windy 70° Thursday, March 1, with my parents and Kira (yes, our dog child) in attendance for the most awesome ceremony. I even cried (never before when getting married – only when taking my oath joining & re-enlisting in the Navy). It couldn’t have been any more perfect, especially after such short notice!
We have no regrets or doubts. It REALLY was the right time!